Hey, so listen, it’s fine. I can see you’re worried. You’ve eaten a lot of chocolate over Christmas. Way too much chocolate. Chocolate for breakfast. Chocolate for lunch. Chocolate for dinner. Chocolate after dinner. Chocolate before dinner. And as a consequence, your clothes may have got smaller in the Magic Shrinking Wardrobe. But relax. It’s going to be OK. Fortunately, the chocolate hasn’t run out. There is still a wall of Cadburys, Galaxy and Nestle chocolate at The Queen's Pantry. If that's what was bothering you. However, if it’s the waistline, fear not. Help is at hand. It’s called The New Year Resolution.

The New Year Resolution is a non-binding agreement between yourself and yourself. Halfway through December, as you realise that it’s futile to try and resist all the finer things in life, you call upon the New Years Resolution to justify spending the next couple of weeks going absolutely hog wild and shoving anything in your mouth that contains over 10 calories. And it’s a free pass. You don’t have to hate yourself. You don’t have to sit in the corner crying, surrounded by empty chocolate wrappers and regrets. Let your hair down. Loosen the belt. Let go of the inhibition. If anyone questions you, you just pull out the ‘I’m having a blowout until January 1st, and then I’m going on a diet’. And they leave you alone. Beautiful.

The New Year Resolution begins in January. Obvs. Cos that’s the start of the New Year. January is named after the Roman God Janus (pronounced Jaynus). He was the God of beginnings and endings, transitions, time, duality, doorways, passages, frames, and gateways. So a bit like a builder with a side hustle in Spirituality.

Janus (Jaynus) is depicted with two faces, back-to-back, pointing in opposing directions. This allowed him to see simultaneously forwards and backwards without turning around. He didn’t miss a trick. I would imagine you’ve got a missus like that.

Janus’s (Jaynus’s) first name was Hugh. His trousers were always tight.

So part of the New Year Resolution, in the small print, is a clause that says you don’t have to stick to it. If the intention is there, sometimes that's good enough. Intentions speak louder than actions, or something like that.

Apparently these are the Top 10 New Year Resolutions of 2025.

1. Exercise more
2. Lose weight
3. Get organised
4. Learn a new skill
5. Live life to the fullest
6. Save more money
7. Quit smoking
8. Spend more time with family
9. Travel more
10. Read more

So let me help you out there. Bring the family to The Queen's Pantry (8 and 9) and walk up and down the aisles of our extensive store (1 and 2). Do it a couple of times. Don’t go crazy. We’ll think you’re nicking stuff. Bring a shopping list (3). Don’t buy 10 bars of delicious Cadburys chocolate, buy 9 (2 and 6). Actually, sod it. Buy 10 (5). Buy some biscuits and we’ll put the kettle on and teach you how to make the perfect cup of tea (4).

So Happy New Year you beautifully imperfect human being. And thanks for taking the time to read this blog (10).

Now. Hand me the Jaffa Cakes.

*The Queen's Pantry is a non-smoking store (7).